Helmet

Hi -

I woke up this morning with an excessive need to pee, but the single digit temperatures outside combined with the 16 or 17 blankets I was under made it a journey that was all but impossible. And my bed pan was missing. So as I lay there and watched the morning news delivered by Diane Sawyer, who I have an odd crush on, I tuned in when they were talking about Rod Blagojevich. I have been following this news intently, and now it is starting to annoy like a pebble rolling around deep within your Zodiacs that you can't get out and feel with every step and dance move. The Governor and his hair need to step down. But his helmet....well, his helmet is very impressive. I was fortunate enough to have the opportunity to gawk at it in person last summer at a Cubs game with my brother and his girlfriend...and let me say, it is nothing short of a perfectly sculpted mass of gel and loose change. I was quite taken aback. It kind of reminds me of the "Big Boy" hamburger mascot. Plus, it sits perfectly atop his oddly shaped peanut head...and the fact that his eyes sit a bit too close together is but a bonus for admirers. Having said that, I am tired of reading about it and hearing about it. I think I'd rather watch a marathon of On Golden Pond, Freddie Got Fingered and  Cool As Ice while keeping that EXCRUCIATING song "Arms of the Angels" by one of the Lillith Fair ladies on repeat. Hell, give me paper cuts for good measure. That song makes me want to drink Drain-O. Also, can we all join forces to inform journalists that the whole ".......Gate" and "....palooza" has run its course? Think about it, every time a scandal comes out it is dubbed something unbelievably creative like "Palin-gate" or "Blagojapalooza". Time to stir the pot, folks. 

So, in light of the recent Rod news, I found this article in the Chicago Tribune this morning and wanted to share...good for a laugh. I've been to this watering hole more than once...and plan on returning soon to see the new artwork. Perhaps at lunch.

In other news, I still don't like pooping in public places.

Enjoy! 

Tyler

www.chicagotribune.com/entertainment/arts/chi-talk-ale-artdec19,0,5136319.story